April 16, 2018

Healing Our Emotions, Healing Our Body

This week, Cedric tells us about how Tipi helped one mother resolve her anger, heal her relationship with her daughter, and heal her body.


Consciously or subconsciously, we humans are constantly impacted by the moods and emotions of others. In fact, we go so far as to push each other’s buttons just because there is "juice" there! Did you ever notice that when we are triggered, the people around us can sense it and their mood or demeanor shifts? Often they do not even realize why they feel this inner shift. This phenomenon is common in adults and children alike.

I very clearly remember working with a 35 year old single mother, Jessica. Jessica contacted me last year seeking help with the intense anger she felt toward her 6-year-old daughter. Most of the time, the anger was triggered by little things, like her daughter not being able to choose between two pairs of shoes or taking too long to get dressed. It is common for parents to have occasional feelings of anger toward their children. Even when they intellectually understand that something is not worth getting upset about, they just CAN’T help it! The anger can be overwhelming. And after they’ve blown up and the child is crying, they feel guilty and terrible about themselves. They resolve to be more patient. Still, the pattern plays itself out time and time again. It is hard on the child, the parent, the co-parent—the whole family.

In Jessica’s case, she would get extremely frustrated and angry when her daughter was slow to get ready, couldn’t make a decision, or left her toys lying around. The frustration was so intense at times that Jessica, a sweet and charming woman, had to walk away from her daughter to scream and punch something—a door, a pillow, anything.

I want to take a second here to recognize that it takes a lot of courage for a parent to acknowledge this kind of behavior and to seek help. Many would be too ashamed, afraid of being judged, to take the steps toward change. But Jessica was committed to a close relationship with her daughter. She could see that her behavior was making the girl feel sad and afraid.

Jessica heard about my work with emotional regulation through a girlfriend who attended one of my monthly free trainings. We met in my office in San Francisco for the session. As I usually do, I asked her how long she will need to notice whether her anger has resolved. I explained that once a negative emotion has been regulated with Tipi, it will never return. Jessica chuckled and said: "I will know tonight or tomorrow morning! But let’s wait a couple of weeks, just to be sure." So we booked our follow up appointment in two weeks and, feeling confident that she had resolved her anger, I was eager for the follow-up.

When the day finally came, as I opened the door Jessica was standing there with a huge smile:

"I don’t know what you did, but it worked!" she said. I asked her to tell me about it, "Well …," she continued, "I did not get upset once in the morning, not once! That has never happened before."  

I said that it was wonderful and congratulated her on the work she accomplished during our session. "Wait, there is more to it!" she said. Since the session, her daughter was noticeably better about cleaning up after herself, getting ready in the morning, and choosing between her pink or white sneakers without anybody having to plead with or push or frighten her!

It made total sense: mom got rid of her button and, instead of feeling blocked or afraid, the child could make decisions peacefully, naturally, easily!

Jessica shared another effect of our session. The eczema she had on her neck for several months disappeared within a few days of our work together.

Sometimes this happens after a session—it is just the body saying "thank you!"

Let me wrap up by saying that the solution to our emotional problems is definitely inside of us. Often, the best way to change a difficult situation is to change our behavior. To do this reliably, we must heal our emotions.

And all of us can do that, our body has the natural capacity for it. The greatest challenge is recognizing and acknowledging our patterns. Once we have identified them, regulating the dysfunctional emotions is straightforward. And the impact is powerful, on our life and on the lives of people around us.

Cedric Bertelli, Director of Tipi USA, has been teaching the Tipi process for emotional regulation in the US since 2011. He was personally trained by Luc Nicon, the researcher who created the program in France. They continue to collaborate closely as this work gains worldwide momentum. Cedric is recognized as a CAMFT-approved Continuing Education Provider, he has been training therapists, Special Ed teachers and other healthcare professionals for 7 years.

April 10, 2018

Facing Negative Emotions

This week, Cedric Bertelli shares how being with emotions without trying to change them actually helps resolve them.

I often get asked by professionals and clients alike:

"Cedric, is emotional regulation with Tipi truly different from other emotional healing modalities out there? What do your classes and program offer that we have not already tried?"

I can’t possibly answer that; after all, I don’t know what you have seen.

What I can share with you is the feedback we receive from professionals who have "seen it all"--psychoanalysis, cognitive behavioral therapy, somatic experiencing. EDMR, mindfulness, or EFT to name a few. Their statements speak to the unique approach and the groundbreaking results they have witnessed in their work with Tipi. But most rewarding are the testimonials of clients who have "tried it all" over the years, yearning to feel better...and finally they do.

In fact, emotional regulation with Tipi is not another "modality" or "approach". It is the very foundation--the essence--of all effective techniques that exist out there. It is the reason behind why those techniques work.

There are countless techniques aimed at healing trauma or disruptive emotional patterns through thinking, theorizing, intellectually analyzing. This is the root difference between them and Tipi. Luc Nicon, the creator of the Tipi Program in France, first noticed the body's natural capacity for healing during his work as an education consultant in major European companies, in the French school system, and in professional sports teams. 

He observed how people who keyed into and followed the physical sensations in their bodies when faced with a negative emotion experienced resolution of the emotion. This observation held true across cultural and demographic divides: as long as people observed the sensations which accompany the emotion without intellectual input, without trying to control them or ease them, the emotion resolved very quickly and did not resurface.

Intrigued by this realization, Nicon spent several years conducting hundreds of observational case studies to understand and define this natural physiologic capacity. You can learn more about the study in the book “Sensory Reliving” (Emotion Forte Editions).

So, in practical terms, how is regulating emotions through our program different?

Well, first of all, it is painless. You do not have to unearth and air out past trauma. The emotional aftermath of past experiences in the present day offer the perfect window of opportunity to heal old wound.

And there is no grueling reliving of past grief, terror, and pain. You will be in the emotional state for one second, after which you will be shifted quickly to the sensorial, where there is no fear or pain. Each session never exceeds thirty minutes, can be done by phone or Skype, and 80% of emotional difficulties are fully resolved after a single session. After each session we will always schedule a follow up, whenever you want, in order to ensure that the disruptive emotion is completely integrated.

Do you want to hear another practical difference? The payment is not per session, but rather per achievement of the desired results, thus completely aligning the goals of the client and the treating professional.

As I've said before, there is no "catch". I'm not looking for repeat customers or a prolonged treatment program. If you are a person struggling with difficult emotions, my goal will be to regulate each one of them in one session. And if you are a professional, over the course of eight non-consecutive days, I will teach you to permanently regulate the emotional difficulties of your clients or patients. So, you have almost nothing to lose and everything to gain....

Until next time!

Read Part 3: Healing Our Emotions, Healing Our Body

Cedric Bertelli, Director of Tipi USA, has been teaching the Tipi process for emotional regulation in the US since 2011. He was personally trained by Luc Nicon, the researcher who created the program in France. They continue to collaborate closely as this work gains worldwide momentum. Cedric is recognized as a CAMFT-approved Continuing Education Provider, he has been training therapists, Special Ed teachers and other healthcare professionals for 7 years.

April 3, 2018

Seek And You Shall Find: A Pathway to Emotional Regulation

This week, I am happy to introduce you to Cedric Bertelli, Director of Tipi USA (a powerful technique for emotional regulation). In this post, Cedric shares what led him to leave his work in the corporate world and immerse himself in this healing modality.


For as far back as I can remember--even when I was in kindergarten--I have been an anxious person. I was filled with a swirling collection of fears, anxiety, anger… you name it.

As a teenager and young adult, I learned to hide this side of myself inside of my work ethic, high performance in school, lighthearted humor. But my bottled emotions found ways of expressing themselves negatively in my body and in my life: I was dealing with eczema, asthma, and crises at home.

After culinary school, I pursued a career in the restaurant business. I wanted to bring joy to people through food. I quickly became very successful in the professional world. But while everything may have seemed easy and smooth for me from an outsider’s perspective, on the inside I continued to struggle with a great deal of anxiety and fear.

In my mid-twenties, I decided to go on a personal “quest”: I wanted to overcome my anxiety and to obtain the tools that would make me a better leader at work. Although many of the modalities I tried were powerful, most of them required ongoing effort, time, and money. What’s more, their effects were not permanent--I felt like I was in a lifelong uphill battle against myself. I was looking for something better…I believe in sustained work, but I also believe in definitive results!

By my late twenties, I was ready to quit my job and leave the corporate world. But first I needed a purpose and a plan. Throughout my career in hospitality and through my own introspections, I became fascinated by how emotions rule our lives: the way we work, learn, relate, how we bond, whom we hate seemed to be controlled by invisible and seemingly uncontrollable internal forces. So, I decided to learn more about these forces. I cast a wide net in my search, exploring programs, classes, and teachings in the US and in Europe to find something that would excite me. That is when I found the work of a fellow French man, Luc Nicon, creator of the Tipi Program for Emotional Regulation.

What caught my interest was that Luc Nicon was not a spiritual teacher or a therapist. He was a researcher working in the field of education, with athletes and major companies as his clients. Another aspect of his work that appealed to me was the fact that any individual could learn it for herself and practice autonomously. I got a copy of his book, in which he describes the technique he built based on 300 cases, and decided that I wanted to learn even more.

When I contacted Luc to ask him about the details of his research and his discoveries, his answer to me was simple: "You’ve got to try the process for yourself: you can do so when you are triggered, when you are in the midst of emotional difficulty. The process", he explained, "will last a maximum of one minute; in fact, most of the time it will take 30 seconds. After that, the emotion you struggled with will be resolved permanently. It just will not be a part of your life anymore."

Hmmm, it seemed way too simple, a bit disappointing actually… To be honest, I did not think the technique would do much of anything. But I have tried much crazier things in the past in the name of self-improvement, so what the hell...I decided to give it a shot. The next opportunity readily presented itself. Every week, during our weekly work meeting, I was extremely triggered by the annoying commentary of one of my co-workers. This Friday afternoon, as usual, when Alphonse started speaking, I felt the anger rising up. Perfect! I excused myself, stepped out into the hallway and applied the technique Luc described during our phone conversation:

  • - I closed my eyes
  • - I paid attention to my physical sensations: my throat was tight and dry, my stomach felt twisted, and I was feeling abnormally hot
  • - I continued to observe these sensations without trying to change them or to understand what was happening. I just stayed present with them.
  • - I noted that my sensations began to change: what felt tight became loose, my temperature rose even more, then went down, my stomach untwisted, and I felt as though all my blood left out of my belly, and then came back to me as a nice, warm feeling.
  • - I allowed all this to happen without trying to do anything until I felt calm. Then I opened my eyes.

All this took less than 30 seconds. I went back to the meeting, feeling a little tired but calm. The fascinating part came in the following weeks when, at the same meeting, I was not at all triggered by Alphonse’s comments. Intrigued, I repeated the process for four other issues: road rage, a work-related anxiety, another trigger for anger, and jealousy. I gave myself six months to note whether the five emotions I had processed would return. During these six months I called several Tipi Practitioners in France to get a better idea about the program and the effects of their work.

After six months, I had to admit that the emotions I had regulated had never returned. I was baffled. Something powerful was happening. I didn’t understand it, but I knew that it worked. At this point, I decided to quit my job and return to France to study with Luc Nicon.

A new life was about to start… 

Cedric Bertelli, Director of Tipi USA, has been teaching the Tipi process for emotional regulation in the US since 2011. He was personally trained by Luc Nicon, the researcher who created the program in France. They continue to collaborate closely as this work gains worldwide momentum. Cedric is recognized as a CAMFT-approved Continuing Education Provider, he has been training therapists, Special Ed teachers and other healthcare professionals for 7 years.

March 19, 2018

5 Ways To Support A Friend Through Depression

This week, Ashley Easter shares five easy ways to support someone you love through depression.


Depression affects millions of people every year. Chances are at some point in your life you will have a friend or loved one who is experiencing depression. You may know someone struggling with depression right now. But how can you, as an outsider looking in, know how to best support your struggling loved one through this dark season of time?

In the following post we will cover 5 ways you can support a friend through a season of depression:

1. Get Informed
Our society perpetuates a lot of misconceptions about depression. Many people use the term “depression” as a catch all for anytime they are feeling sad but clinical depression isn’t synonymous with ordinary sadness. Clinical depression continues for an extended length of time and may include symptoms such as fatigue, difficulty concentrating, changes in eating habits, lack of interest in activities one once loved, suicidal thoughts, and yes, feelings of sadness or hopelessness.

For you to be the best support for your friend, you need to become educated on the truth about depression. Instead of relying on pop culture's depression diagnosis read medical journals and online medical articles or talk with a professional about the effects of depression. The more you understand what your loved one is going through the more you will be able to effectively support them.

2. Have Compassion vs. Condemnation
When supporting a loved one through a season of depression, it is essential not to heap on additional condemnation. Your friend is likely already having self-deprecating thoughts. Don’t add more weight to their burden. Avoid painting depression as their fault and in their total control. It is not helpful to suggest that they pray harder, think happier thoughts, or buck up and move on. Because
depression symptoms may make it difficult to engage in everyday jobs or activities some people will assume that the person struggling with depression is lazy or lacking determination. This is not the case, and healing depression is not that simple. Suggesting otherwise implies that your loved one is at fault for their pain. Depression is often caused by a chemical or hormone imbalance, stress, trauma or other related issues. All of these are out of your loved one’s control.

Instead of telling your friend what they should do better listen when they are willing to share how they are feeling. Offer empathy, understanding, and words of kindness. Remind them that they are loved and that you are proud of them even during this time of depression. Your compassionate presence will go a long way even if you don't have many words to say.

3. Use The Number Scale
When someone is in the darkness that is depression, sometimes it is hard for them to communicate their feelings even when they are in a mind frame that could lead to self-harm. This is understandable and asking for a person with depression to describe their feelings when they are in deep pain can be overwhelming and ineffective. That is why I like to use the number scale.

Ask your loved one to rank on a scale from one to 10 how they are feeling. 1 represents feelings of happiness, 5 represents mid grade depressive feelings, and 10 represents plans for self harm. The numbers in between help a person gauge how close or far away they are from these markers, when they are worsening, and if they are approaching a dangerous phase.

If possible present this scale when your loved one is feeling good or moderately good. Discuss how this can help them effectively communicate with few words in overwhelming seasons.

This can be a great tool in tough times and can help you monitor the changes in your loved one's feelings if they are willing to honestly share.

4. Find Professional Help
Depression is not a personality flaw or a spiritual sin issue it is a mental health condition and often requires professional support to find solutions. If your close friend or loved one is going through several weeks on depressive symptoms suggest that they reach out to their medical doctor and start treatment with a licensed therapist.  The therapist may be able to get to the root of the stress or trauma causing the depression and provide ideas for self-care and recovery. If the issue is chemical or hormone imbalance a medical doctor and can perform simple tests and ask appropriate questions so they can prescribe medication to relieve the symptoms of depression.

Sometimes in the middle of depression a person doesn’t feel able to make appointments for themself. Offer to assist them in finding a doctor or therapist, and with their permission, you may even be able to set up and attend the appointment with them.

If at any time you feel your loved one may be considering self-harm immediately call 911. You do not need their permission for this and it could save their life.

5. Remind Them Of Who They Are
Your loved one is experiencing depression, they themselves are not depression. Take time to remind your friend of this. Remind them of what they mean to you and others. Let them know they are not a burden, they are your friend and that you are happy to support them during this difficult time.


Ashley Easter writes, blogs, speaks, and advocates for abuse victims. She founded The Courage Conference, a yearly event that empowers survivors of abuse to fight for their healing while also educating church leaders on prevention and proper response to abuse. Ashley promotes truth-telling, advocates for gender equality, and educates churches on abuse. You can find her at www.AshleyEaster.comwww.TheCourageConference.com; Twitter: @ashleymeaster; Facebook: /ashleymeaster

March 6, 2018

When Faith Communities Make Depression Worse

Meet Ashley Easter, powerhouse world-changer who is on a mission to empower survivors of abuse to fight for their healing while also educating church leaders on prevention and proper response to abuse. This week, she explores the challenges people of faith face when dealing with depression.


I grew up in a very conservative portion of Christianity, and I have met numerous people from similar faith backgrounds who struggle with depression. While many find solace in their faith during times of depression, unfortunately, some religious communities perpetuation harmful myths about depression that only add layers of pain to those already suffering.

Here are some of the myths about depression I have heard coming from some religious communities:

       Depression is a spiritual issue or spiritual failure.

       Prayer, Bible reading, and sermons are enough to heal depression.

       Christians shouldn’t see licensed therapists, only bible based pastoral counselors without psychology degrees.

       If you take medication for depression, you are not trusting God enough.

       Suicidal thoughts are sinful, selfish, and damming.

       You need to get over your depression, or you are outside of God’s will.

       Christians should be the happiest people in the world, if you struggle with depression or suicidal thoughts you are not a true Christian.

Despite what some may tell you, depression is not primarily a spiritual issue, and it is certainly not a spiritual failure. Science shows us that depression can be caused by a myriad of things including stress, trauma, and chemical or hormonal imbalance in the body and brain. You are not at fault for the way you are feeling. Depression and suicidal thoughts are not sinful or an act of selfishness, but they are serious mental health issues that deserve treatment.

Depression needs to be treated by mental health professionals like doctors, psychiatrists, and licensed therapists. At times a person may find comfort in prayer and scripture reading on their own or by a pastor friend, but this should be in addition to and not in contrast with professional healthcare specialists. Just as you would not seek medical attention from a pastor-counselor, who is not also a licensed medical doctor so you should not seek primary care for your mental health concerns from a pastor who is not also a credible, licensed therapist.

Professionals often have solutions and tools to address depression such as therapy treatments or medication. Relying on these medicines and medical advances, long-term or short-term, does not in anyway take away from your ability to trust in God. We take antibiotics for illness and view this prescription as a gift. In the same way, a person of faith can use medication for depression and know that this is also a gift and does not detract from their spirituality.

I was recently watching an interview with a celebrity who no longer identifies as Christian. Even though she is no longer in a faith community and she had changed her beliefs in many areas she admitted that she still has nagging guilt and fear around mental health issues such as depression and suicide due to her past faith background.

Whether you identify as Christian or not, harmful myths from spiritual leaders regarding depression can still haunt you. In addition to the science of mental health linked to above, I want to remind you that even Jesus called out in what seemed to be a depressive state in the garden right before his arrest and again in anguish on the cross. If even Jesus experienced extreme seasons of deep emotional pain, I believe God has compassion for those of us suffering from depression too.

If you are a person of faith, I want you to know that professional treatment for your depression is not in conflict with faith. You deserve to find support and healing.

If you are a faith leader, I encourage you to examine how your words around depression and other mental health issues significantly impact those in your care. When in doubt refer out to professionals and approach the subject with compassion. Doing this will show you take seriously your responsibility to safe, pastoral care.


Ashley Easter writes, blogs, speaks, and advocates for abuse victims. She founded The Courage Conference, a yearly event that empowers survivors of abuse to fight for their healing while also educating church leaders on prevention and proper response to abuse. Ashley promotes truth-telling, advocates for gender equality, and educates churches on abuse. You can find her at www.AshleyEaster.comwww.TheCourageConference.com; Twitter: @ashleymeaster; Facebook: /ashleymeaster

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